Child Rescue Foundation, CRF Domestic Violence Workbook

This workbook was developed by the Child Rescue Foundation, Inc. The purpose of this guide is to assist adults and children impacted by family violence in their recovery to a more safe and peaceful way of living. This guide is intended to be used by professionals that support domestic violence victims and for victims who want to empower themselves with some tools necessary to stop the cycle of family violence, and to regain safety in their lives.

The following information can found in this book:

Signs to recognize domestic violence, stalking and cyber stalking
Ideas for creating safety plans that can assist you and your family
Techniques for being a credible witness
Tools for immigration, name change, and other items necessary for safety
Weekly road map for recovery guides
Worksheets, suggested action plans, motivation materials, and chapter concept reinforcements

With any drastic change of life, set backs are common. Feeling alone is a normal part of the process. However, each recovery process is unique. You will find weekly-suggested guides, exercises, reading materials, daily affirmations, worksheets and support statements from others who have gone before you. Feel free to keep it with you, and a copy with a trusted individual. Take this guide and use it to keep focused on the positives that lie ahead. Remember to always seek the professional help of police, victim’s advocates and therapists when needed.

The Awareness Workbook for Victims of Domestic Violence and Stalking is 146 page step by step manual for children and adults seeking to recover from domestic violence.

Target: All Victims of Domestic Violence

Length: 2 hour training

Cost: $150.00/per book (includes training Colorado only)

Out of state $75.00 CDROM $45.00

Book Order Form

We appreciate your request and interest in the Awareness Workbook for Victims of Domestic Violence and Stalking ™, published and written by the Child Rescue Foundation, Inc., located at PO Box 102319, Denver, Colorado 80250. The Board ofDirectors and the Security Division of CRF, Inc. reviews all acquisitions requests weekly. Because of the sensitivity of the material in these workbooks, care and attention are given to requestees so that requests are handled and delivered to qualified individuals working in the domestic violence/provider/victim advocate/medical/legal and justice fields. Please allow 2 weeks for the review process and background check, and 2-3 weeks for shipping and handling. Use the following form to make a book acquisition request. Please fill out the form as completely as possible. Please direct any questions or comments to J. Kappel @ childrescue97984@aol.com

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Workbook $75.00 - CDROM $45.00 - SH $15.00

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CRF Contribution Information

CRF Domestic Violence Workbook

Table of Contents Introduction
Disclaimer	2
About this Workbook	3
Development and Production Team	4
Table of Contents	5
Acknowledgments	10
Author’s Note	11
Letter from the Executive Director	12
Foreword	12

Part One - Domestic Violence

Chapter One – Identifying Domestic Violence - 14
Denver Domestic Violence Facts	14
Are You the Victim of Domestic Violence?	15
Are You Really in a Violent Relationship or is Denial just a River in Egypt?	16
Propensity for Violence Checklist	16
The Holmes Stress Test	16-19

Chapter Two – Identifying Precursors to Violence – 20
The Generational Perpetuation of Violence	21
Cycle of Violence Wheel	22
Phases of Domestic Violence	23
Indicators of Coming Violence	24
Victim Insanity Model	25
Power and Control Puzzle	26

Chapter Three - Children and Domestic Violence - 27
How Domestic Violence affects Children	27
Facts	29
Conflict Resolution and Bullying	30
Youth Violence	31
Ten Hot Relationship Buttons	32
Several Tools for Understanding and Managing Conflict	32
Are you Raising A Predator?	34
How Children Perceive Domestic Violence	36
Children’s Section on Domestic Violence	38
STOP, LOOK, LISTEN: To the warning signs of domestic violence	39
Signs and Symptoms	40
The Effects of Domestic Violence on Our Children	40
How I Can Help a Child	42
Commentary-Biased Family Court System Hurts Mothers	42

Chapter Four - Dating Violence and Abuse - 46
Definition	46
Facts	46
Indicators of Abuse	47
My Notes	48

Chapter Five - Safety Plan - 49
Making a Safety Plan	49
Escape Items	50
Goals of the Abuser/ Predator	51
If It’s Not Me, Can I still Help?	51
Tri Fold Quick Look	53
How to Enhance Police Response	54
Your Rights as a Victim	54

Chapter Six - Domestic Violence Review – 58
Get support	58
Call 911/Contact law enforcement	58
Make a checklist for leaving during an assault	58
Carry the items checklist with you for making an escape	59

Part Two - Domestic Violence is NOT OKAY

A Book for Children and Adults dealing with Domestic Violence – 60-85
Coloring Book for Children from Aurora Family Violence Response Team-86-97

Part Three –Stalking - 98

Chapter Seven - Introduction to Stalking – 99
From a survivor	99
What is Stalking?	100
Colorado Revised Statute 18-9-111 - Harassment – stalking	107
Stalking Statistics	109
Stalking: why do people do it?	110
Commentary: The Crime of Stalking: How Big Is the Problem?	111

Chapter Eight - Coming to Terms with a Stalking Relationship - 115
Are you in a stalking relationship?	115
Types of Stalking	115
Types of Stalkers	116
The Goals of the Stalker	116
Bullseye	117
Victim Insanity Model	118

Chapter Nine - Getting out of a Stalking Relationship - 120
Taking a Stand and Drawing a Line in the Sand	120
Exercise	120
Cycles of Violence	121
Getting Out Making a Safety Plan	122

Chapter Ten - Cyberstalking and the Law – 124
What is Cyberstalking and Can I prosecute an On Line Stalker?	124
Protecting Yourself on the Web	125
Safer Surfing Tips, Hints and Red Flags for Internet Abuse and Your Protection	126

Chapter Eleven - Safety Plan Taking Action-127 Making a Safety Plan - Escape Items If It’s Not Me, Can I Still Help? Goals of the Abuser / Predator	128 129 129 129
Tri Fold Quick Look	130
How to Enhance Police Response	131
Your Rights as a Victim	131

Part Four - Recovery

Chapter Twelve – Paper Layers - 133

Path 1: Understanding Trauma - 136
What is grief	136
What is PTSS(Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome)	137
Tools for Trauma	139
Kicking the Addiction-getting on with it-understanding fear	144
Finding Support and Help	145

Path 2: Journal: Reflection on Feelings- Choosing Survival and Recovery-148
Take a moment for a Self-assessment	149

Path 3: Establishing a Support Network- 150
The Red Wagon of Woes	150
Why don’t you Just leave?	150
Establishing a Support System	151
What the Batterer wants you to know	151

Path 4: Good Parenting-154
Re working the generational perpetuation of Violence 154
Understanding the perpetuation of Violence in the Family 154
Parenting with Love and Logic	156
Custody and DV	158
Domestic Violence and children who witness violence	166
Making a Safety Plan with your Children	168
Signs and symptoms of kids who witness DV	180

Path 5: Emotional Make Over-181
Positive self talk: 12 Tools for Living with Intent and responsibility	181

Path 6: Getting on with it/Dealing with fear
Dealing with Divorce, custody and DV	184
CRF reading List	185
Divorce On Line help and Checklist	188
Easing the breakup	189
Collecting child support	189
Changing your name	194
Immigration	194

Path 7: Stepping Forward into the Light 198

Path 8: Forgiveness 199

Path 9: Finding the Path of the Peaceful Warrior 201
Establishing your faith base	201
Choosing your program/ PAIA	201
Making a plan	202
Daily Assessment	204
Day by Day/Journaling every Day/Goal Setting	206
Prayer/Mediation/Release	209

Path 10: Reaching out to help another-212

Path 11: The new Mirror/Freedom-213

Chapter 12 - Paper Layers: a book on abuse to recovery from The Child Rescue Foundation-215

Sample Court Forms

Part Five – Managing Your Case

Chapter 13: Enforcing the Law -248

Child Support Enforcement of Child Support 249
Strategies to Improve Supervised Visitation Services in Domestic Violence Cases 250
Recognizing Common Batterers Behaviors In Supervised Visitation Settings 253
Strategies to Improve Supervised Visitation in Domestic Violence Cases 255

Chapter 14: Managing Your Case-261
Frustration discussed from the Victims advocate, Court, Police and the Victims
A Volunteer’s Perspective	261
Imagine	261
Being in Charge of your Life: How to be a credible Witness	264
The Restraining Order	265
Managing Your Case	266
Maintaining Accurate Status Reports/Sample status report Forms	267
Educating Yourself About Your Day in Court	270

Chapter 15:Domestic Violence in the Workplace 278

What is DV in the workplace? 278
Tips for Employers, Workers and Friends of the Victim 279
Reading the Signs 279
Identifying the precursors to Violence 279-283
Assessing the Danger of violence
Victim Insanity Model
Employer /Victim relationship 283
Laws that work or Don’t 284

Part Six – Reference-273

The Restraining Order	287
Journal	288-291
Monthly Guidance	292
More Help Online	293
History of CRF	299
Conclusion
Appendix/Forms /Bibliography	303